Hey remember when I used to cook all the time, and post pretty pictures of food along with delicious recipes? Those days seem like a distant memory right now, having no A/C in the kitchen will do that to ya. Luckily for us all, we’ve had the A/C in the living room running pretty consistently, and on Tuesday night the kitchen was relatively cool. I figured I could probably handle turning the oven on for an hour or so I decided to see what all the hoopla is about, and make me some engagement chicken. The magic must have died, because I’m not engaged. Wait, what’s that you say? You’re supposed to feed the chicken to someone other than just yourself? Does my cat count? No? Hmm, go figure.
Anyway, Engagement chicken could also be called, chicken with a shit ton of lemon juice, and some salt and pepper. For the very small list of ingredients required, it jumped way up to the top of my “easy to make and eat all week” list. The hardest part for me was figuring out what breast side down meant. I mean, I know what I look like breast side down, but the chicken confused me. After some googling, and looking at my chicken, and back at the picture on the computer, I figured it out.
The very short list of ingredients
The bird got doused in 1/2 cup of lemon juice and covered in salt and pepper. Stuff two lemons, poked three times with a fork, up it’s butt and it’s good to go in the oven. You pre-heat to 400, then turn it down to 350 once it’s in the oven.
seasoned with lemon juice, salt, and pepper
Is it weird that I think the chicken looks kinda cute? I mean, look at it!
I almost, almost, can imagine cuddling with it. That is weird? Ok, I thought so. Anyway, into the oven like that for 15 minutes, then you take it out and flip it over. Also, if you’re me, you burn the shit out of yourself.
look! It's giving birth to a lemon!
Back into the oven once flipped for about another hour, or until the meat thermometer hits 180 degrees. Let it sit for 10 minutes and stare at it while you anticipate eating it. Then remember you have no idea how to carve a chicken and start googling.
it's done!
Become impatient with following instructions, throw your knife in the sink, and start ripping the chicken into pieces with your hands. Uh, that gets a little messy, so it’s not the recommended route, but I wasn’t serving anyone but myself so it worked.
Oh, hell, yes. See that juice, that’s just amazing deliciousness right there. I served the chicken with a box of frozen veggies and potatoes.
Ok, ok, I’ll now admit, I guess I can see why this is called Engagement Chicken, I bet men do find it amazing. I emailed a picture to Dar with the subject “I am fucking awesome” and he told me I was weird. HOWEVER, he did say that the chicken looked amazing, so ha! I’ll probably make this again, when I have someone around to do the carving for me. I’m really clumsy with big knives and would probably end up without a finger eventually. The end.
Filed under: Daily | Tagged: cooking, engagement chicken, lemon, pepper, salt |
My Verbal Vomit 
HI KELLY HI HI HI !
No but seriously, I can’t look at that cute chicken and not see this:
You’re an a hole. Hahaha I laughed out loud at work.
@marie: this. is why I love you.
Excellent job on the chicken, it looks delicious! I can never carve it either and end up just tearing peices off. But really I think that’s how nature intended.
Agreed, why else would we have opposable thumbs
I just made my first successful roast chicken, too! Similar ingredients; I rinsed and dried, rubbed with olive oil, sprinkled lemon juice, then rubbed with salt, pepper, and greek seasoning. I put the lemon halves and 5 slightly broken cloves of garlic in the bird then baked. It was AMAZIIINNNGGG.
I made engagement chicken for Scott when we weren’t officially together. I figured it would be a really good experiment. We’re now living together, but clearly not engaged. Perhaps it takes a few years (or tries?). Your post was heavily amusing especially the part about carving. I have no idea how to do that either.
Yay, I’m glad you found me amusing, haha. I was drinking (shocker) when I wrote it so I wasn’t sure if anyone else would find it funny.
Preparing a whole chicken scares the crap out of me.
Maybe this is why I’m not engaged?
Picking up a chicken at the grocery store tonight…
Haha, you could do it, I promise.
I love roasting whole chickens…it’s the only thing I don’t ever screw up. Looks great!
I made this chicken back in October or November for Mike and I. I had given up and really didn’t think it worked. Little did I know, shortly after making the chicken, Mike was looking for an engagement ring. So it definitely worked in my case 🙂
Aha, so it does work!
You know, roasting a whole chicken like that would scare the crap outta me, but it looks sooooo good. Are you going to make chicken broth with the bones?
Ya know, I didn’t even think about that and threw the carcass (ew such a gross word) out.
haha that IS a shit load of lemon juice. Looks good though! and I think they’re cute too – I get sad at the lake when the boys put the beer can in them and they’re like propped up – it’s just too much of a reminder that it’s an animal! 😦
Hahaha yes!
Damn, I’m super impressed. The thought of cooking an entire chicken scares the shit out of me.
You could totally do it.
My boyfriend roasts whole chickens all the time. I really want to try one myself but I’m terrified of having to pull all the guts and shit out of it…so I haven’t.
That’s why I bought a chicken that had them already removed 😉
this post made me LOL! Good work Kelbel.
Haha thanks Jilly
I love roasting chickens. So easy and tons of leftovers!
Looks really! I am beyond impressed that you made a whole chicken…not gonna lie…that intimdates me!!
This one was super easy, I promise.
My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 3 years, and for the last 2 I keep hearing about ‘Engagement Chicken’: The mystical dish that turns non-committal men into romantic butter… But I am afraid to try it!
I almost believe in superstitions just enough that if it didn’t work I would be paranoid that my otherwise wonderful relationship is DOOMED!
There’s no need to inform me I’m a crazy-person, I am already aware. LOL!
Haha, no I’m with you. I doubt I would make it for my bf if I wanted it to work, because when it didn’t I would probably give up all hope. You’re not crazy!
Ok..so we have engagement chicken, how about something for the step before that? Like “fall in love-hot dogs” or something?? 🙂
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